dreaming duplicity

dreaming:
at a party at jackie's, recognize a number of the people, there is this little boy there, from next door, whose always liked me and i sit with him for awhile, i see the rock girl, but i wonder where the others are, alot of people i remember from before, from the solstaces

at a different house and there are all the missing people, and i ask them why they arent at the other party and turns out they didnt know about it, and that made me really sadSong of the day:

say good-bye to keeping it live

was at my corner coffe shop last night, met a friend up there, and was looking forward to hearing the wednesday night local band do their rendition of stairway to heaven or an indigo girls tune. i walked up and sitting at the table outside was a small cluster of women that caught my attention due to the packed up instruments and sour expressions, and i thought "now, what could really be that bad?"

inside, my friend had already arrived and was considering her options of cold drinks. i leaned onto the counter and looked down at a newly added sign that read "we are sad to report that as of now, all live music has been suspended until further notice"

the barista in charge on wednesday, a face familiar from a number of years of working coffee bars and running open mic/live music selections was on duty and i said "kevin, why?" he says to me that the big recording companies had been contracting out to local agencias to approach local coffee shops and bars to demand royalties for bands playing covers and that this particular coffee shop couldnt afford the payment, and so could no longer offer live music

having dome some research, it appears that they technically cant even have a football game on without having to pay royalties for the theme song to 'monday night football" (which i didnt even know existed, let alone pay attention to)

i believe that for most bands, sharing the love of music and keeping it live, even if its a terrible newly minte\d high school garage band playing the worst rendition of "smeels like teen spirit" ever, is what its all about....too bad that the big guys, instead of finding a new way to address the money leak from the inter-net bound self producing individuals that are the future of music 9(think radioheads magnificent move to offer their album at consumer set price), they are taking the joy of music away from all

peace out all

Song of the day:

purpose

maybe a blog doesnt need to have purpose...

i have just finished up a period of covering fukll time at the hospital, and find myself feeling like i have some breathing room this morning....and in this breathing room i want to write.

the hardest part for me is that i CANNOT talk about work in this space, my joys and heartaches, approval and indignation...

too many people have lost their employment due to speaking up on the internet reguarding their employers

....but i can talk about healthcare in general, and i can talk about gestalt, and i can write poetry, i can talk about love of nature and i can keep family and friends updated

that is enough purpose for me for now

Song of the day:

camping all by meself on jojo's land

which will- nick drake

i love this guy...most people think he's sad, i think he knew the truth, as his sound feels more honest than most i have experienced...thanks for sharing this with me

Song of the day: which will- nick drake

high hopes

i had such high hopes when i started this blog, to make a difference, to tlak about things that have meaning for me, to live a more aware existance....

recently, as i get more into being healthy and employed, i find i talk little here....

the professor that inspired me, she is no longer interested, and i have not found a new inspiration.....but i still have high hopes....i will be considering the direction this blog will take moving forward, bacause as of right now, i feel like i am kind of wasting space

Song of the day: anthem-leonard cohen

more dreaming and a deer story

i came face to face with a deer yesterday at shaker lakes (yes, i checked myself for ticks), we just looked at eachother for a minute or two, and then she moved quietly into some trees...i know they are common now but for all their regularity, i have never encountered one...it was intense

any how, i dreampt about alex from gestalt last night...we werent friends again in the dream, but i bought her a tv, and me and some friends took it to her house, but it wasnt the tv she wanted, so my friends and i let to get her the right one, so we go to a store, i think i made my friends ignore a party to get the right tv, and i got this white tv that kind of looked like a big ibook
, and it had a cover that opened from the middle and folded out to each side...so maybe like two ibooks together...i cant explain it better right now, but i took it to alex who set it up without saying a word and my friends and i left to have fun

i know there is alot missing in this waking memory, but it seemed worth it to catch

Song of the day: my groups class mix cd- various

post-camping dreams

i had a restless night after this last wolf creek (which i hope to have time to write about, but for now i dont), i fell asleep around 10, woke about 2, tossed and turned til 4:30...but from that point until i got up to shoxer at 5:30 i dreamed....i dont remember them all, but i want to capture these

1. it was some sort of overnight workshop at jackie's house, only i brought my cats along, and it wasnt really jackie's house. my kitten echo wa playing while i was straightening up, and i heard this 'oomph' and i turn around to look at echo, but it wasnt echo, so i blinked my eyes, rubbed them, trying to figure this out, when i realized that there was another kitten sitting on echo, and the dream panned back to view the whole room and there were about 6 more kittens, and i felt a little anxious about this, and then i went to look for jackie to find out what this was, but couldnt so i came back to my room, ready to let any other cat owner that may be thinking my room was their room know that it was in fact my room, i got there first.

2. sitting on a couch across from another couch, jackie in a chair to my left. an older woman across from me and a younger woman next to her. the older woman asks me a question, i dont remember what it was, and then she asks me a second question, which was obviously a come-on, and the energy in the dream shifted, as it seemed very out of place for her to be me asking this, and jackie, in a disapproving tone, admonishes "marlene?!!" only it wasnt marlene, and i actually muttered that under my breath

then i woke up for my day.....what do you think?

Song of the day: how could anyone- libby rodereick