medicine wheel

my friend alex and i set up this medicine wheel tonight, though i am tired and do not feel like running over the whole thing tonioght, i will add text tomorrow....

....i kn ow i said i would write text, but its the first day of a gestalt weekend, ive already overslept, need to get to the bank so as to have quarters for parking, need to dress to the nines because i have a meeting at weahterhead over at case western reserve university with a gender and diversity professor in the organizational behavior program...theres more, but telling you why i dont have time to write this morning is taking up an awful lot of time

Song of the day: circle round the wheel- brooke medicine eagle

quetzalcoatl

sure enough is a snake with feathers quetzal, a type of bird and coaatl meaning serpent....but its an aztec god, not an incan god and i am sure i learned about this at some point in elementary school or something...

Song of the day:

another feather?!

a feather came floating out of my freezer when i went to get some ice...i mean, it must have found its way in with the ice packs after i went camping, but i really did wash everything off well....i thought

hess says i should look up quixicotal (spelling?), that he was an ancient incan spirit, kind of like a worm with wings...i think i will have to

Song of the day: indus-dead can dance

yet another feather message

so in the hurry of the week, i did not get around to talking about anything at all....i actually worked yesterday, EGAD!! (no really, i picked up some week days over the next couple months so i will be a little more employed again)and ive been thinking about robin (ill call you tonight to see how youre doing), so the fact that i just camped and that i camp again this friday has been kind of side margained

one thing that came up at the brooke medicine eagle weekend: animal allies and visions

my animal ally was the earth worm, and we were broken up into small groups (the professor was in my group) and we each asked a question of everyone elses animal allies...i asked how can i have intention without destroying everything on the way (as seems to be the way it is working right now)and the professors ally (the praying mantis-what an odd interesting animal)and the praying mantis said i had been trying to walk but needed to fly. now, i was still struggling with this piece of advice- couldnt put meaning to it even though it made sense (i am a toe dipper, not a dive-right-inner), but then an intersting occurance came about...

my god father is healthy enough to do my weekly injections again, and while we were bonding after it yesterday, i disseminated the weekend for him, but walking home, i thought on how i didnt mention the professors advice, about flying, and i looked down just in time to see a feather, whole and large, on the urban sidewalk.

then walking to dinner, i was thinking about how strange that i should come across a feather while i was thinking about being told to fly when i came across yet another feather...but i accidentally left that one at the restaurant...

Song of the day: learning to fly- tom petty

"Well some say life will beat you down
Break your heart, steal your crown
So I started out for God knows where
But I guess Ill know when I get there...

Im learning to fly"

a heartening dream

dream: outside sitting with jackie, she reaches out and strokes my left cheek and she says "i do love you, you know" , and i respond with a strange grimace that slightly pulled away from her touch- "dont get me wrong" she says, knowing that the pull away is because i am confused by this after everything else "you really annoy me at times, but that doesnt discount that i care

it is hopeful for me because I know, it isnt about jackie, it is about what is inside my heart....ive been reading up on sufiism, and this book says that the essence of the teacher speaks to the essence of the seeker, and the teacher is just a mask, empty, impersonal- a bridge to the self......i just had trouble tolerating the ache i felt when i woke up.

Song of the day: put it out for good- amy ray

more feathers

hess suggested that you, the readers would be more interested in hearing about what we did at wolf creek then in my subjective experience...but that is all it is....we walked, we sang, we intended....we expereinced...and as i process it so you shall understand as i do

anyhow, there have been alot of feather messages in my world recently, and it just doesnt seem to be slowing down....i found a hawk feather at the lake last thursday, a blue jay feather on saturday during my vision quest,

and this dark, majestic feather today....


Song of the day:wind beneath my wing- better midler