"you've had a stroke" says the opthamologist
"excuse me!?" says i
"true, this is rare in a woman your age, but you are a heavy smoker, and taking the pill (birth control) seriously increases the likelyhood of a stroke" says he
"i don't take the pill" says i
"yes you do" says he
"no i dont" says i
"there is really no other explanation" says he
"i have never taken birth control, i'm gay" says i (and i was, i have since relaxed my self definition to i connect with people, and sometimes the connection is sexual, regardless of gender)
"cramps" says he
"i have never taken the pill" says i
"all the same, you are experiencing a bilateral loss of vision in the lower right hand quadrant of both eyes. classic sign of stroke" says he "is there anyone i should call?"
*******************************************************
"i got you on the nine pm flight here" says mom
"i still dont see why you won't come here instead" says i
"because cleveland has some of the best medical care there is, thats why" says she (besides, you're too afraid to fly, i think)
"i already talked to dr. deuley, and she said we should go to the emergency room first thing tomorrow morning" says she
"is it really safe for a person who's had a stroke to fly" says i
"it'll be fine" says she
(yeah, just like the sun spots are fine, i think)
"do you have a ride?" says she
"yeah, stacey will take me" says i,and hung up on her and smoked some pot then packed my bag (i am a light traveler) for this glorious trip home.
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