Monday, November 06, 2006

out of the comfort zone


stepping outside of one's comfort zone is most definitly a difficult thing to do. i know that i am very much stuck in a comfortable place. unfortunately comfort does not mean enjoyed. i sprained my foot yesterday morning (tripping on a shoe...what a waste of an injury, no cool story behind it or anything), and i am going to use the down time as an opportunity to get this space away from moaning and whining and back to having purpose, starting here, discussing the comfort zone.

my friend michelle was saying to me the other day that she had a hard time at my birthday celebration because it was not what she was comfortable with, and the older she gets, the less willing she is to step up and take risks (and to think she will only be 27 this month). talking with her, i see the damage being complacent in comfort can cause- in her life, it displays as a very narrow set of interests (boys, boys, and more boys), and a lack of connection due to such. in me, one way it shows up is in this public journaling instead of addressing the social and political issues that interest me. its much easier to talk about the internal experience than focus on public things with a new eye, a view that hasnt been thrashed to death... no one can disagree with me on my feelings.

i believe that change only comes through discomfort. i believe the world needs to change, therefore, the challenge is to be willing to give up the comfortable....i had a gestalt facilitator that really created a group cohesion when he said to us, as we whinnied about embarrasment and safety that "i love my discomfort, i embrace it!!", and what a difference that made to the weekend, that line became a group mantra, and after our weekend, we helped eachother through emails, often with the closing greeting of "embracing discomort, (name)"...

there are people in my life who totally disagree with that, my analyst grimaces everytime i use that saying to stay where i need to stay (though she hasnt really told me why it displeases her so), hess says ackowledging his discomfort causes it to dissolve so no need to embrace it, but what ever the individual response, i commit to sitting more in discomfort again (or is this just more journaling?).

Song of the day: red river- ledbelly


Anonymous said...

Comfort zones... "fort". Building a fort against new experiences? They can also be negative if the person has to be on the go all the time to be comfortable - not sitting still. Hmmm. Big thought, lots to think about. (R)

molly said...

(smile), i like the way you put that. and yes, for people who are more uncomfortable with down time, room to think, being alone, things like slow paced vacations, or an individual retreat for a weekend might cause some resistance...a fort.

Anonymous said...

I wish we had a slow paced vacation. If only.....Can I stop being mom for 2 minutes? Well, at this point I guess the answer is no. I don't think I'd have it any other way, though...(just in case another friend of yours reads this - mommyhood has its just rewards)

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