wednesday, one of the guys from my coffee shop, lamont, gave me a white carnation. dont know why, but i accepted it happily and off i went. i forgot to take into the house with me though, and when i got to the institute yesterday, the white puff was still sitting on the passenger seat and it occured to take it into the workshop with me, feeling mildly silly but entirely myself.
well, surprise surprise, the workshop starts, and there are four stools sitting in the middle of the room, each one supporting a vase, three full of purple, yellow, orange and red flowers of multiple types, three full of flowers and one empty vase in the middle of this set up.
while two faculty read poetry, each group member had to go up in orderly fashion and select a flower to add to the first empty urn. sounds a little hokey, i know, but it worked in the moment, and as it the exersice got closer and closer to done, i reached into my bag and pulled out the white contradiction and placed into the vase.
my doubt on if this program was right for me, my doubt on if i should wait for kirsti to be able to join me, it disappeared (though i will be highly jealous should her time come and she gets both jackie and phil, i can imagine i will spend a few days crying if that becomes a reality...i cant help it that i am scorpio, and that type of response is inherent to the allignment of my stars). my doubts were alleviated by there being a place for my flower, and by my having a flower that spoke to how different i felt from everyone else in the room with me to bring to the situation.
Song of the hour: cello song- nick drake
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